You're A Mean One, Janet J
Okay, to be fair to Janet Jackson, she only looks like she snarls at the Whos while perched atop Mount Crumpit in the picture above. In the rest of the pictures, she doesn't look like she's going to...
View ArticleNatalie Portman Won Last Night
Natalie Portman's baby brewing area is going to grow into thousands of pixels before our very eyes in the next few weeks as she accepts Best ActressWhatever at every awards show for her performance in...
View ArticleWhat In Ordinary Hell Is Helena Bonham Carter Wearing?!
What I mean by that is Helena Bonham Carter always shows up to the opening of WHATEVER looking like a Cyndi Lauper circa 1984 who dropped the wrong kind of acid and ended up in the bad part of Oz where...
View ArticleThe Shemalien Who Fell To The Earth
Posing on the border where my nightmares meet my wet dreams, Tilda Swinton wipes the skid mark left by Kim Kardashian's skank shit off of W Magazine in a series of gorgeous pictures that make me want...
View ArticleTilda Swinton Wanted To Murder Her Baby Brother Once
Tilda Swinton plays the mother of a psychotic sociopath crazy in the movie We Need To Talk About Crystals: The Spencer Pratt Story. No, she plays the mother of a teenager murderer in We Need To Talk...
View ArticleAll Hail Tilda!
In the sea of candle faces, burnt sienna skin and rejected bridesmaids dresses, out came an alien goddess from planet Bowie whose hair blows without any wind around it. They should've put a giant...
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Stacy Keibler Has Officially Been Replaced
Nothing says "Stacy Keibler, please pick up the box of your belongings at the front gate and immediately report to the halfway house for exCLOONunicated hos" like this picture of George Clooney...
View ArticleYAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSS!
Either this is some serious Life of Pi-like CGI trickery or David Bowie and Tilda Swinton are actually two separate alien gods from a planet where beings are made from the core of diamonds.Besides a...
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This Is Art: Sleeping Tilda
When I take a long nap in public, the police wake me up and tell me to put on my pants and go sober up at home. When the humanized form of a unicorn horn Tilda Swinton does it, people wait in line to...
View ArticleDance, Tilda, Dance!
As I watched this video of the alien albino cockatoo Tilda Swinton dance like my abuelita after an extra sip of communion wine at Roger Ebert's film festival in Illinois a few days ago, I read the news...
View ArticleLike A Flaming Golden Unicorn Sent From The Heavens
Don't be worried about that tingly moistness you feel in your nipple area. You just secreted gold glitter from seeing Tilda Swinton and Tom Hiddleston together in one place. It happens to everyone....
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